So I'm incredibly frustrated right now. Plus I’m just crazy tired, but I can’t sleep right now because I have shit I need to deal with, namely venting about shit I have to deal with. UGH. Uhm, basically, there are two people I want to vent about right now, but can’t, because one of them read this and so I instead just vented to the ginger about that person. The second person I need to vent about is someone I don’t think I’ve really talked about on here before. She’s my cousin, and I think I’ve mentioned her, mentioned how much I dislike her, how much she’s fucking up her life, fucking up her parent’s lives, etc. Well, maybe not to that extent, but she’s at least been mentioned. I think. So basically, she decided to run away because, as she puts it, her parents don’t give her enough freedom. Now, before you go around pointing fingers at me and calling me a hypocrite, listen to the entire story. Yes, I do realize that I too ran away from home when I was in high school, and I also know that I said it was because I was fed up with them not giving me any freedom. HOWEVER, I was more than reasonable in my claim. It was so bad then that I had to beg to go out to see a movie with my friends. My “friends” had stopped being my friends because I kept having to say no to going out with them. I mean, do you understand how strict my parents had to be for my “friends” to stop asking me out? Pretty darn strict. Yeah. So now, this dumb bitch thinks that her life is like mine. She thinks that because her parents won’t let her do stupid shit, (which they actually do let her do) they’re too strict. I mean, her parents knew she smoked weed. They didn’t care. They bailed her out when she got caught stealing shit from the mall. You don’t even understand, this girl is ridiculous. Her parents used to hate me, that is until they realized how much worse their own daughter is. Now I’m the angel. I’m the goody two shoes who’s reformed and become all “proper” and whatnot. This girl has run away from home because she was too scared to ask her parents if they’d let her go to Niagara for New Years. So she went anyways, without telling them, and now she’s too scared to go back home cause she thinks they’ll be mad at her. I mean NO FUCKING SHIT. This BITCH thinks she can do whatever the fuck she wants? I mean, ugh.
Oh wait, you don’t know why I’m so mad about this, huh? Basically, because my aunt and uncle are dealing with my cousin, my mom and dad are all stressed out as well because my aunt is my mom’s sister. My mom and her sisters are REALLLYYY close. They like.. breathe each other. So, because my aunt is stressed, my mom is freaking out and taking it out on my dad, and they (my parents) already had enough shit to deal with, because, if you remember, I think the last time I mentioned them I mentioned the huge fight they were having and the fact that they were seriously considering getting a divorce. Hmm, maybe I didn’t mention this fight. Well yeah, it was just a really big, stupid fight.
So, yeah, because of this stupid bitch and her need to do whatever the fuck she wants, all the time, my parents are all stressed out and trying to hide it from me. Of course, because I’m the one who’s away at uni, I have to hear all this second hand, and all broken down in tidbits, each bit from a different person. But eventually, when I piece it all together, I make some sense of the situation, and it is this. MY COUSIN IS A WHORE.
That feels good to say. Especially when I see her, and I think of how she’s totally throwing her life away, and just doing all this stupid shit. Plus, (I feel I can honestly say this because it’s my blog and I say all that’s on my mind) I kinda just hate her because she’s so pretty. Yeah, I know, really shallow, pathetic thought, but I can’t help it. Each time I see her, I just feel like crap about myself. She’s this incredibly skinny, tall, tanned girl, with thick black hair and just, these huge eyes with really intense dark lashes. I swear, this girl is stunning. And I hate her for it. I don’t like being all shallow and shit, but I can’t help it. I don’t try to notice how pretty she is. I just do, and I hate it. I think I’m just typing for the sake of typing now, so I’m going to move on.
Uhm, actually, I don’t have much else to say. I already said that I couldn’t vent about the other person on here, plus, I already relieved that burden onto both a paper and a friend, so I’m good there. I really miss my ginger. I miss having my best friend with me. Now I’m just sadface all the time. Not really, I suppose, but I’ve been more depressed lately, overall.
On a brighter note, I printed off nine resumes and handed them out all over the mall today, so I’m hoping somebody will call me back, or e-mail me to set up an interview, and hopefully, offer me a job. You don’t even understand how badly I need a job right now. It’s to the point where I’m considering working the residence caf. Oye.
Alright, I’m tired now, so I’m going to bed. I’m sure I’ll write more soontimes. And please don’t judge me for the lack of coherence in this post, it’s already 4 in the morning, stupidity is permissible this late at night.
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